Doula's are the most necisarry thing to pack for the hospital

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28

I feel like I REALLY need to highlight our amazing doula. Her name is Stephanie Stear, and I'm lucky enough to have her as a friend, as well as my doula for my pregnancy with Sophia.You can view her website here www.livinglovely.org. 

Stephanie was fabulous. We had a very hectic schedule the last few weeks of pregnancy, but she was very accommodating, and checked in via text at least once a week. When I *thought* I was in labor, or was in pre-labor, she was there giving me advice on how to make things more comfortable, or was on her way to assist. That feeling of being in labor all by myself... completely gone. Yes, my husband deserves a medal for being so amazing and helping as best as he can... but there is something about having another WOMAN, who has been through labor naturally, and who KNOWS how bad it sucks... that just really makes it possible to keep thinking I CAN DO THIS.. Instead of I WANT TO KILL MY HUSBAND.

So, for those of you who is a tad out of the loop on all this "natural" labor business...? Natural labor is that really ridiculous idea some women get, because they really like pain, and hate needles. ((OK... so that’s not really it at all)) Natural labor allows you to connect with your body, and your baby. It allows you to be in control of the pain, instead of letting the pain control you. It is an absolutely beautiful experience. AND. Recovery? Awesome. Day 8 today, and I *think* I'm done with the gross stuff.

Another plus of natural delivery? So my situation was crazy rare, and might have helped speed things up... but the contractions got bad at 9:30... And she was born at 11:08. Quick? VERY. And I will be honest... I used my code word. My contractions at 5 cm, were what they continued to be to 10cm... So I had a very very fast and hard labor due to what had happened with little Soph.

WHY a doula?

*Awesome Support

*You don't feel ALONE

*IF you need assistance, you have someone to help

*She will give you OPTIONS, and the opportunity to have your birth plan whenever acceptable

*Pain management QUEEN. Really... they are amazing.

*If anything goes from bad to worse... you have someone there to comfort you, support you, and take photos.

If you are considering a doula, you can search for one at doulamatch.net. AND if you KNOW you’re having a stillbirth... I highly recommend having a doula specially trained in it. Ours wasn't, but her faith and strength, and our friendship, made it to where she is now looking into getting certified for it. AND she was amazing even without the certification. 

If you've been praying on ways to help moms who go through stillbirth, or who want to just have a natural birth, you can find information on how to become certified as a doula, here.
http://www.childbirthinternational.com/
http://www.dona.org/develop/birth_cert.php

If you really would like to help stillbirth moms cope, but cannot be a doula, consider calling your local hospital, and asking what their needs are in the way of stillbirth moms. I will tell you, that coming home with a box of photos, hair clippings, she hand and foot prints, a blanket, a baby ring to put on a necklace, and cards was really helpful. If they don't do a program like that, but would be open to starting one with assistance, see if you’re church, or friends, would be willing to help fund or donate items for the boxes. The one thing I think about constantly is the moms who give birth to TINY stillborn babies, and don't have anything to dress their precious babies in... So tiny clothes, and premier clothes would definitely be helpful I'm sure, at any hospital.

Most importantly, pray. Pray for doulas, and moms, and hospital staff who face this. Our hospital was in shock, and I was my doula's first client. This isn't something they see on a daily basis, and it changes your heart. Pray that their hearts are opened by it, and that they are surrounded by love and support. Pray that they look into classes for handling these situations, and that they find peace in the thing that occurred. And most importantly, when you hear or meet someone who is a doula, give them a hug. We all turn into raging crazies in the midst of labor, and these ladies do everything in their power to make sure our husbands survive alive, and we get exactly what we want out of it. That. That is amazing work.